Wednesday, May 28, 2008


D&C completed yesterday. Thankfully, the hospital my RE is affiliated with has an ambulatory center. I did not have to see one pregnant woman!!! - Yahoo!!! I choose to have my GYN handle my first D&C because I have a better relationship with him. He is a people person and knows exactly what to say in a crisis. This time around I knew what to expect so I decided to give the RE a try. It went fine.

At first, I was pissed because he told us to get to the hospital at 10:30 am only to find out the appointment was at 12:30 with the procedure at 2:00. It turned out he had another surgery in the hospital's General OR that took longer than expected. He finally called the center at 11:30 to say he would be arriving by 12:30. There was another woman waiting before me that had a whole host of problems. Her surgery was expected to take 1.5 to 2.5 hours. Yikes...I was ready to run. There was no way I could sit there another 2 hours at least. I keep a cool head and let my doctor come to his own conclusion that the schedule didn't make sense. So I was bumped up. I felt horrible for the other woman because she had been there before me and waited longer for the doctor but, it would only delay her surgery by no more than 20 minutes. Phew...She was ok with that and I told her I was very sorry. I left recovery around 2:30 and she was still in the OR. That poor gal!!!

DH and I are doing fairly well. I won't say the second miscarriage is easier because I am probably still under the influence of drugs and pregnancy hormones. The nightmare is yet to come. My body and head don't like the hormone adjustment. I typically go to a very dark place that has no room for optimism or hope. But, I do pull through eventually. Hope does return. That bitch!!!

DH and I are trying to guess who will announce their pregnancy next. It never fails when I am either cycling or having a miscarriage we get a phone call from someone with their big news. We are definitely feeling the defeat of IF. I expect my old infertile friend that I posted about on April 7, 2008, to send me her birth announcement soon telling me how glorious motherhood is and that hopefully I will get the chance too. Whatever witch!!!

Mr. G and I have decided to take the summer off. We have my husband's best friend's wedding in late July. DH was asked to become a minister to officiate the ceremony. He felt very honored. The wedding will take place on Lake George with a lobster bake afterwards. Our friend rented a huge house on the lake for all of his close friends. Unfortunately, we cannot stay all week because of a work obligation I have which really sucks. So Mr. G and I decided to take a luxury vacation in August. We are looking into Paris right now but, the dollar sucks so bad. It probably won't hold us back but, we started pricing the airfare and hotel and we are at $4,500. I have no problem paying money for a nice hotel but, I resent the cost of airfare. It is so much money but, we are still shopping around. We both need a major break from all that has happened to us.

I think by September, I will be ready to start a FET. I am not looking forward to injections. I have never been on it and I hear such terrible stories. My RE says it isn't so bad because usually he will add estrogen and progesterone after seven days. But, he has never taken it personally so what does he know. I also worry that it will just result in another miscarriage. I am hoping we find the one good egg or it ends in a BFN. I don't want the in between.

I am done with being a little pregnant.


Lori said...

I think a break is a wonderful idea.

WG, I am sorry you went through this. Again.


journey to junior said...

i am so, so, so sorry.

Melanie said...

It sounds like it went as well as it could and you sound, well, well. As well as can be expected. I think your plan to take off the summer is a darn good idea. I'll be doing the same thing. And I'm a firm believer in pricey vacations after bitter disapointments. My BFN sent me to St. John and my miscarriage is sending me many places this summer (and not to the psyche ward thank god). Treat yourself.

(I also was nervous about lupron when I had my FET, but it didn't bother me a bit.)

Kami said...

Here is to a happy Summer! I hope you find some peace an joy.

I'm sorry this one didn't work out, but hope the FET will. I didn't want to take Lupron either and my RE was willing to let me use the standard IVF protocol with generelix instead of lupron.

Ms. J said...

Oh Sweetie, I am so sorry bout all of this. I am glad you have a caring Ob/Gyn for your D&C and didn't have to face the Fertile Myrtles of the world at the hospital. Both of those factors were a big help for me with m/c #3. But you're right, the afterwards is still so emotional.

I hope you will still post on your blog? If you need to chat please feel free to leave a comment on my blog and we can always email privately.


JuliaS said...

I wish you a summer of peace and healing and wishes for many good things to come - and soon.

I am midway through the last month of a three month Lupron shot. It really hasn't been as bad as some of the horror stories I heard too.


Portia P said...

I hope your summer treats you well and that you come through the dark times quickly.

Have you thought about looking at immune issues? That could perhaps account for the miscarriages...

Thinking of you xxx

Freyja said...

I'm sorry doll!

Barb said...

I just found this post. I'm so sorry. :(